I have always believed in the power of prayer. I don’t believe its the Lord’s desire to see his children in pain, nor live with chronic pain, maladies, or other issues. Doesn’t that sound a bit cruel?
If I’m walking with my child, and they trip and fall, I don’t watch them cry and wait for them to get over it. Instead, I help them get up, and if there is something in my power to make it easier, facilitate healing, or make the pain go away, I administer that. And if I don’t have the power to make it better, then I take them to the doctor.
The Bible is replete with references to the Lord as the divine healer. That isn’t a recommendation or thoughtful adage….it’s something we should depend on. In fact, I’ve always wondered why, when a church has healing services, the leadership doesn’t address all the glasses in the room. Am I right? Glasses are a sign of an incomplete body part, that needs healing.
In my own life, I’ve tried extra hard not to rely on medical care as a crutch. That will sound harsh, but it’s not meant to be. What I mean is, I don’t go running to the doctor for every little ailment. When I was in the hospital recovering from c-section, I took half the pain pill so I wouldn’t be loopy. I probably wouldn’t have been loopy, but I was taking that approach just in case. And when I stubbed the heck out of my baby toe, I KNEW I had broken it. It was my first broken anything, so in a way it was a badge of honor. Did I go to the doctor? Nope. Instead, after about two weeks, it felt so itchy, so I looked it up, and lo and behold the “itchy” was a sign that the broken bone was attempting to heal; it was the histamines at work.
When I shared this with my adult child, they questioned my reality. They claimed I couldn’t “self-diagnose” and wouldn’t “really” know it was broken. I mean, how do our kids think our ancestors worked with their remote locations but by knowing their own symptoms? Good lord! SO, I went to the urgent care, paid to have the X-ray (grrrr) and, gee, I was correct. I had broken my toe. There was nothing they could do by that point. Oh, and let’s not forget we already knew of the “tape two toes together” trick, which is what they still use 40 years later…sigh. We are in trouble if our adult kids can’t rely on instinct even on occasion.
Of course, like all young people, they simultaneously think they are above reproach, and more intelligent than their parents. Isn’t that what the 20’s is for? Harumpf. Rebellion, I say. Isn’t experience the best teacher or is that an alternate universe?
One leftover from my youth that I just can’t quit shake, though, is the exact same thing. I know better for me. Which brings me to my current situation. See, about five years ago I was hit hard with overwhelming all over pain. I mean, I could barely get out of a chair without help, or I’d have to get on my knees and lean on a table;I actually had to use the stair rail like it was my job; and the pain was not managed with OTC meds. It was merciless. Finally, I went to a rheumatologist. As it turns out, I was diagnosed with “fibromyalgia” and osteo-arthritis. To be fair, it was a shock. Still, the doctor prescribed some pain meds, which turned out to be an antidepressant, and did an X-ray of my knees, claiming I have mild arthritis in my knees.
After that first initial bout with Fibro, I felt much better with the med. However, I wasn’t depressed, I was pissed! I wanted to be pain free, and I wanted to treat the problem not the symptom. So, I stopped seeing the doctor, quit the med cold turkey across a few days, and settled into my routine of managing pain when I could.
I started taking liquid Tumeric, Alleve when necessary, and watched the barometric pressure. When a rain storm was coming, I would feel much worse. Oh, and interestingly, I felt much better across the fall and winter than in the spring and summer.
The kids were suffering from my unexplainable bouts of pain, and that bothered me so much. I have no trouble going to the pool and jumping in with the kids, and this pain was frustrating. However, this year, as winter turned to spring, the pain was overwhelming. It was the addition of a new symptom that did it for me.
People with fibro can have all over pain, yes, but one insidious attribute of the condition is feeling irritable with each touch, by clothes, by anything. When that hit, I knew I was in trouble.
Praying for full and complete healing as that is God’s best for me, and you, is essential. However, as much as I’d prefer a radical and complete healing, I will have to do my part in the waiting period. Ever see a kid fall off a bike? The first thing they do, if they can, will be to get out from under the bike, while crying, and try and help themselves. If they trip and fall, they will get up and hold the painful area while attempting to remedy the issue. They do what they can-depending on age and maturity, of course-to help themselves and then rely on older people, usually parents, for next steps.
I guess I’m there. I can’t live with all over cinching pain, knee and hip pain, finger joint pain, headaches, piercing pain from what may be a ruptured ovarian cyst, as I need to manage the pain in the waiting. So, that’s what I’m going to do.
As it is it has been four months since I broke that baby toe, and the side of my foot and that joint still hurt some. I guess that’s part of breaking something. I have no idea. Perhaps this journey to pain relief will affect that left over pain, too.
It’s not a defeat to fight the good fight for yourself and your health. It’s often recognizing what is out of your power and control. And that is the sign of maturity.