Dude! Every parent handles homework differently, don’t they? Some sit with their kiddo, ensuring a studious approach. Perhaps focused precision will help the little academic be prepared over the long haul. Other parents are engaged, but also multitasking, busy doing something else in the same room: making dinner, folding laundry, pulling their hair out….whatever. I swear some parents are at the ready, waiting to pounce should the little lovely make one tiny error. After all, an error on their part is an exact reflection on them.
There are the more sinister parents we know exist but we don’t often acknowledge-the ones who actually DO the homework with for their kiddos. You know the ones. These are the kids who seem to have the attention of the teacher(s), perhaps the entire school drools at their very existence. They often fall into two categories: kids who shine because they have so many accolades, and those who seem like a deer, caught in the crosshairs of doting adults, afraid they will be pinned by a buck shot at any moment. Those are the ones our kids complain about the most.
Me? Ha. I’m not those parents. Maybe I’m just too old school. Perhaps I need therapeutic intervention on behalf of my solitary treck through the long road of compulsory education. I do not do homework at all. I don’t review homework with my kiddos. I don’t look in their backpack. I refuse to sign homework logs. I don’t even sit and listen to them read. GASP! Sure, they read anyway, because new readers cannot help themselves! They read every darned sign we drive by, “Peep show…Mom, what’s that?” Sigh. “Don’t ask,” I lament.
“Covert parking,” is corrected to “covered” parking because I care about elocution and enunciation. I do. Jane and John no longer run because those books are not longer relevant to our kids. No. I have to listen to how Captain drawers has decided on a new adventure. I halfheartedly listen because it interests my baby, and that’s all. But, I don’t sit enthralled. I get excited that my 6 year old can read the instructions on how to insert batteries and change the channel, and do it better than I. I love that they know money means commerce and if they commit to memorize their value they can complete their own transactions sans mom. Why sit with them and watch them draw backwards dollar signs?
My kids learn because that is how the human mind is created. Ever wondered where the phrase, “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree” originated? Where else does that little precious one learn those behaviors? At least my kiddos learn positive behaviors: We do chores, lots of them; they see us reading, often (of course, learning to delight at the smell of a new-or used-book is waining as we use tablets and computer screens…meh); we make choices-good ones I hope; we are seen cooking and completing activities that interest us called hobbies; we attend activities; we try to develop relationships; we pray; and so many other things. We may occasionally pick our nose…we may get mad. We also may show our raw selves, and we ALSO talk about those things, too. Admitting we have a problem is the beginning of change, right? Well, that’s the hope I suppose.
Homework is an interesting phenomenon. Homework should reinforce what is learned in the classroom, it should not be new learning. It should not come with instructions for the parents. It should be familiar for the student, no matter the age. Homework should be a quick review, not hours long. Homework should not rob, steal, frustrate. Homework should. be. specific. not. test. driven.
And while I may seem aloof when it comes to homework, I’m far from it. I’ve actually written notes to schools and teachers about homework and written ON homework. My child will not be doing this homework because it is: new; takes too long to complete in their short evening; takes away from moments we won’t get back; does not support the curriculum; is not germaine to their life; serves no purpose; is busywork….I have a basket of reasons, I just pull one out and write it down. Can I just say, I’ve not had a good rapport with any principal? They tolerate me. I do not have to tolerate them. Why? Well, my paycheck does’t rely on whether or not test scores go up or down, and my child’s happiness doesn’t either. OH, and my smarty pants kiddos do not take the tests, either, because when homework is preparing them for tests, then it serves no purpose for their learning, and isn’t that the point of homework to begin with?